Bittersweet Endings

I don't honestly know where to start with what I'm thinking and feeling right now. I'm just looking at the calendar counting down the days until my SBS experience will be over. Bittersweet is such a fitting word because it encompasses so many feelings all in one - you're sad, you're excited, you're afraid, you're confident, you're confused, you have a head full of knowledge...and the list continues.
This week I have felt as if I have so much time on my hands that I don't know what to do with. It's like the end of a race when you are still pushing hard, but you begin to slow your pace down. Going along with this analogy, my feet are tired from the long trek through SBS, yet looking around at those running with me I can see that the end is coming upon us all too soon. I will never be with these people all at once again and, though it is a harsh reality, I will likely never speak with many of them again. Some I will keep in contact with, but trying to stay in touch with 41 people - not including staff, is a tough job. I cannot express the growth I have experienced this year with these people - the good times and the hard times. It has been so amazing. I am surrounded by awesome people who are completely in love with Jesus and passionate! I hate to think about going home and realizing that not everyone is in love with Jesus, and many lose their passion.
On top of all of this, I am excited to come home and experience the continuation of this growth. I am excited to meet new people and move into different areas of ministry. It will be the turning the page of one chapter and beginning to write another. But the exciting part is that I am not the author - God is! He is so faithful. I'm laughing at myself because just 9 short months ago I was dreading the idea of SBS, and now everytime I see these people and look around at the beautiful lake surrounded by beautiful mountains, and when I hear the sound of the babbling brook, I can't help but think that I don't want to leave this place. It will be so good to be home. I keep getting confirming words that even when I don't know what I'll be doing for certain - whether that be school this fall, SBS staff in Australia, or even little things like where I will work - God has me right where he wants me. HE is the one who directs my steps. HE makes my paths straight. God, may I be faithful to the calling you have placed on my life for this season. I love you so much and am excited for the new adventures you have for me.
SBS - It's been my joy and privilege doing this school with you. I hope our paths cross again. You all are amazing people who love the Lord with all your hearts.